


MusicAcademyStuck

by AceOfHearts



Series: MusicAcademyStuck [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen, Mild Language, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-27
Updated: 2013-04-02
Packaged: 2017-12-06 17:09:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/738080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AceOfHearts/pseuds/AceOfHearts
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John Egbert is the new student at a prestigious private music academy. Being a prodigy, he gains instant popularity from his peers, except for one that seems bent on disliking him...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hey, new kid

You are John Egderp-I mean John EgBERT. You are a new student at this academy. The name of this academy..? It's not important right now. You are currently standing awestruck at this building. You came here because you were invited to attend your high school years to improve your music skills, starting as a freshman. You shrugged and replied an affirmative, even though your skills are unbeatable and cannot be matched by anyone. You were that kid, the one people call a prodigy, also getting fame at an early age because you mastered the piano; playing pieces perfectly even when looking at them for the first time and even memorizing them. Anyway, back to the present, wait. Not yet. After you sent back your reply, the academy sent you a long list of stuff you should pack before coming here. They also put in a small footnote at the bottom saying that you are to leave immediately. This strikes you as a bit weird, but you shrug it off, once again, and start packing. You decide not to follow what the list says, because traveling lightly is the way to go. You stuff your few belongings, necessities, family photo, books to read, and music into the suitcase your dad bought you.

Your dad stands at the doorway, holding a cake in his hands that reads, "Congrats, you're finally leaving the house to start living like a man". You face palm and give him a manly hug as thanks. He asks if you're going to take the cake with you and he refuses to take no for an answer. He then proceeds to shove the cake in your direction and runs off sobbing. In a manly way of course. He is such a manly man, your dad. All those cans of shaving cream, pipes, and hats. You shake your head. How does he manage to keep all that stuff in one place, more like how does he AFFORD to buy that much?! That is none of your concern right now, as you had more than five years to come up with the answer to that question. Your dad ceases his sobbing for a few seconds to remind you to write letters while you're gone. You groan slightly but agree to it, and rush out the door, as you "accidentally" forget the cake your dad made. So! Back to the present, no matter on how you got here in the first place.

Unbeknownst to you, while you were busy gawking at the massive size of the academy, a few shadows were watching from the windows above… You are now the mysterious shadows lurking in the upstairs of the academy. Who will you choose? Too late, it was already decided that you will have this particular shadow. Yes, this one. The one that's closest to the window with a frown on his face that clearly says that he will cuss out anyone who dares talk to him. Your name is Karkat Vantas. You are a troll that clearly has anger issues but refuses to deal with them. (It's a wonder that you have friends, really.) Although you seem to hate the world, your friends, and yourself, you actually care deep inside. All these warm, happy feelings are under your façade. You should really lighten up sometimes.

Right now, you are looking through the window at the ground below, at the entrance grounds. More specifically, you are looking at a teenage boy who just seems to be standing there like he was for the past half hour. You wonder when he's actually going to stop looking like an idiot and actually enter the building. You cross your arms and your frown deepens even further (if that's actually possible; seems to be the case). You turn away from the window and start to leave the room. The other shadows at the back of the room look up at you and start to ask questions. "What were you looking at, Karkles?" "Is something bothering you?" "Are you angry AGAIN?" You decide not to answer these questions but just mutter, "There's a fucking new kid standing outside like a dumbfuck. I'm leaving. It's not worth a shit to look at." You quickly exit the room, slamming the door behind you, as the group inside shakes their heads in sympathy.


	2. A little bit like paper airplanes (not)

You storm off, but you can't figure out why just looking at the boy made you feel so angry. Composing a musical piece should make you feel better. Oh yes, you were not only Karkat Vantas, the troll boy with anger issues and expletive bombing, but you were also a master composer. Any piece for any mood, for that is your specialty. You quickly grab a pencil and feverishly start writing on a piece of paper that magically appeared from nowhere. After about 15 minutes, you finish with the grand total of 6 pages. Feeling satisfied, you head out the door with your head down and your precious sheet music cradled in your arms. Not looking where you're going, you crash into someone and papers fly everywhere.

"OH MY GOG!" you scream at the person you crashed into. "WHY CAN'T YOU FUCKING WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, YOU FUCKASS?!" Of course, the said person wasn't the one who crashed into you; it is YOU who is in the wrong here. "NOW ALL MY SHIT IS FUCKING EVERYWHERE BECAUSE OF YOU!" The crashee tries to apologize but you don't listen, because you are on a roll at this moment. "THIS IS FUCKING INEXCUSABLE AND DON'T EVEN TRY TO APOLOGIZE, YOU DUMBFUCK!" While you were ranting, the stranger picked up the papers, arranged them, and was handing it back to you. Embarrassed that you were cut off mid-rant and because the incident was purely all your fault, you snatch only half of the stack in your haste to run away. "Wait!" The stranger calls after you, "You forgot the other half!" By this time, you are too far away to hear.

You are now John Egbert. Now you are entering a flashback. After you had finished gawking, you entered the academy and dumped your stuff in a corner for later pick-up. You decided to explore the building, as there was nobody around and you had nothing else to do. You made your way around a huge water fountain in the lobby and picked one of the towering spiral staircases. This place was clearly a rich school; you saw it everywhere. You turned your head every which way, trying to absorb and memorize all your surroundings. You were walking at a fairly steady pace, when someone rounded a corner at full speed and crashed into you. End of flashback.

As of now, you are staring at the spot where the angry troll was standing a few moments ago, with the remaining stack of papers in your hand. Torn between deciding whether to return the papers, which equals to another cuss-out and rant, or to go back to get your stuff and explore more, you choose option number two. But first, you should try to find an office of some sort to help you, like getting a schedule of classes and the like, and to find a room, of course. Upon closer inspection, there seems to be a sign posted on a nearby wall with instructions.

The instructions give you combinations you must musically reproduce on… You squint to see smaller script, "on the tiles of the marked off sections of the floor." Picking up your things, you make your way over to that area, that area has an instruction poster too. "The office is opened by stepping on the tiles marked by quarter notes." You think that it seems easy enough. You do the said instructions and the tiles split in the center to let a rising room come through. You have a mini spaz attack but knock on the door and receive entry. The headmaster of the academy comes to greet you and starts to tell you the history and rules of this place. But, we're going to skip those parts because I'm sure it would bore you, the viewer, to death. After this long speech, the headmaster gives you the key to your room and directs you to an elevator called the "Room Elevator" on the far side of the room. He tells you to stick your key in the keyhole inside the elevator so that it would take you directly to your room. You do so, and in a manner of time, you're standing in front of your room door. You unlock it and step inside to see that your room has been furnished just the way you like it and more.

Heck, it looks just like your room and home. You have a disturbing thought for a second. What if this WAS your room back at home? Even worse, what if your house was part of this building? You immediately dismiss this thought because you'll probably start thinking your dad is the headmaster or something crazy like that. Anyway, you start unpacking and organizing your stuff and after you're done, you start looking over the stack of papers you might have stolen, albeit accidentally. Upon further inspection, you see that it's not just any old stack of papers, it's sheet music. The notes start coming together in your head, and you get the feeling that the melody is full of anger. Wanting to try it out, you grab your key and rush out the door with the music to find a place where you can play it. You enter an elevator and decide to go to the office to ask for the location but stop when you see a keyhole labeled "Music Room". You're a little suspicious at how easy it is to go there, but you ignore that and insert your key. Nothing stops you when you're on a music mission, however corny that mission name sounds. You finally arrive to your mission area, and you bust through the doors like it's an emergency. You quickly locate a piano and sit down on the piano bench while arranging the music. Your eyes scan over the music and you immediately start to play. Your body becomes rigid with tension as your fingers fly over the keys, striking fast and hard, angry even, as you become absorbed in the music.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, these cliffhangers I write, or lack thereof... Don't forget to review if you can! Because reviews are love! Thanks!
> 
> -A0H


	3. Flip-Out Time

You are now Karkat. After your tantrum in the hallway, you run as fast as you can away from that place, clutching the music. Ugh. By this time, you forgot what and where you were going in the first place. You take the "Room Elevator" and go to your room to organize your thoughts and your sheet music. While shuffling through the sheets, you slowly start to realize that you are missing half of the music. This causes you to slam your face on your desk and keyboard, and repeatedly bonk yourself on the head with your fist for being SO STUPID. You start to panic a little bit, because everything you compose is very precious to you and you would flip out if anything happened to them. You grab your key and rush out the door (just like someone else did) but you are man on a MISSION. Mission name: find missing sheet music. You pace through every hallway and go up and down every staircase, but you don't go to the Music Room area.

As a last resort, you decide to go there, even though you don't believe that it could actually be found there. "See? I told you I was right, there is NO chance I would find it here-." you argue with yourself. Wait. You stop. You can hear faint strains of a melody coming from the Music Room. "It couldn't be?!" You run down the hallway and stop in front of the room doors to peek in through the door windows, like the stalker you are. Just kidding, but you should just go in there. You almost tear your hair out in frustration. "Karkat, you are so stupid in believing that the music is your- NO. WAIT. HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE. That IS my music. Every sheet I write on is ALWAYS written in red ink and with my initials or nickname on it." You squint. "AHA!" It is just as you suspected. "It IS my music and that dumbfuck over there is playing it. He's playing it so well; he must be really goo-NO. He's a THIEF. I'm going to kick his worthless little ass and take back what is rightfully fucking mine." You prepare to bust down the doors with your righteous anger. Before you do so, let's review over your options.

Choice 1, calmly enter and politely ask for the music back. Choice 2, rush through the doors and attempt to flip the piano and run back out laughing like a madman. Choice 3, kick the doors open, grab the music, cuss out the person who took them/and is playing them, and stomp out the room while flipping off that said person. All signs point to choice 3, and you do exactly what is just said except you are interrupted in mid-action because the stranger grabbed your arm. "Hey, uh, this is your music, right?" You turn and face the speaker and flinch, because one, he's the new kid you saw outside, and two, his face was a few inches away from yours. His blue eyes stare earnestly at your face as he waits for your answer, "I uh..I-I-I-I YEAH IT 'S MINE, YOU DUMBASS!" You mentally kick then congratulate yourself on your oh-so-smarticles particles answer. You shake off his grip on your arm and hastily pick up the sheets of music, deciding not to flip the guy off, and start to run off (again), when he asks for your name. You falter slightly in your step, but answer without looking back, "Karkat. Karkat Vantas." "That's a nice name, Karkat," he calls back. "Thank you," you answer with a slightly sarcastic tone. "Oh, well, um, I'll be seeing you around then! Hey, wait! My name's John Egb-.." He gets cut off by the door slamming back into place as you left. You smirk slightly as you whisper to no one in particular, "Nice to meet you, John Egbert..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How did Karkat know John's name? Is he really that famous? Or is Karkat just a stalker...? (I say third choice ;D What about you?)
> 
> Karkat: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP! YOU *beep* *beep* *beep*!
> 
> A0H: Now, now, Karkles, this is only my commentary after every chapter. If you don't like it, just say so! And can you please stop using expletives for just a FEW minutes? Yes...? REALLY?! Good.


	4. Introductions

You are now at the point where you can pick your own character. You thought I was going to say John or Karkat weren't you? Ha-ha, nice try. Let's see, you can pick your own character, NOT. It's a random pick list that becomes longer as you meet more and more people. The random list chooses Sollux Captor, another troll, and also Karkat's best friend. You are now Sollux Captor. You speak with a lisp and have almost everything in twos. You are the academy's best percussionist and also a whiz at hacking and programming computers. As of now, you are trying to program your computer to commune and get commands with the rhythms you skillfully hammer with your drumsticks as you play on your drum set. It's not going too well, and your eyes are starting to crackle with red and blue psychic energy, when you hear a knock on your door. You remove your glasses and rub your eyes before you open the door. Karkat shoves past you without saying a word and starts banging his head on the window. You stare at him like he went crazy, which he probably did, and say, "KK, what's wrong this time?" 

He ceases banging his head for a few seconds as he says, "It's the new kid. I don't know why but I don't like him and he makes me annoyed every time I see him." 

You think for a few seconds before replying, "Is he really that bad?" 

He screams the word, "YES!" and you make your mind up to go pay that kid a visit. 

"What's his name?" 

"John Egbert." 

"THE John Egbert?!" you say, surprised. 

"I DON'T FUCKING KNOW. GO LOOK FOR YOURSELF, DUMBASS. HE'S PROBABLY STILL IN THE MUSIC ROOM," he yells back. 

You shrug and head to the aforementioned place and just as your buddy KK suspected, the kid was still there, practicing piano. You couldn't believe that THE John Egbert now was attending this school, your school.

That kid is like a freaking prodigy. He didn't need to come here! I mean, just LOOK- I mean, LISTEN to him. You come up behind him and say, "Sorry to interrupt but-.." He turns around with a big smile on his face and says, "Oh, no! You're not bothering me!" He laughs a little and you can see he looks a little nervous. Nervous from what, exactly? It's probably from being new, poor kid. You think he needs a few friends to help him settle in. You offer to take him around the academy campus and introduce him to some of your friends. He accepts your offer with an even bigger smile that lights up his whole face. His enthusiasm makes you a little happy too because it was so infectious. You get the feeling that he can make friends pretty easily by just...SMILING. Anyway, you decide that inviting all your friends to come along might make the tour easier and fun. You pull out your computer from Gog knows where, pull up Trollian and start trolling your friends. You troll everyone on your list at the same time and tell them to come to the Music Room. They don't ask why and you wish that they would at least be wondering why you made them come. The first to arrive is your BFF Karkles. Of course, he has his signature frown on his face, as always. "Man", you think, "he really needs to lighten up sometimes. Wait, no, ALL the time." He catches sight of John and recoils back as if John is some kind of infectious disease. Good thing he didn't see Karkles's face, because you are 99.999 percent sure his feelings would have been crushed. 

You excuse yourself and you drag Karkles to a discreet corner. "KK, you stop this right now," you hiss. "He hasn't done anything to you, you butt face. And, he hasn't even been here a full DAY yet either." 

"But-", he starts to retort. 

You cut in swiftly by saying, "But NOTHING. You act nice or I will kick your sorry butt into next week." His face pales a little but pales even more when you add a nice little detail that is too gruesome for words. *A little something with buckets and Eridan.* 

"Fine." He snorts. "Just because I'm going to be nice doesn't mean I'm going to like him." He crosses his arms and pouts childishly. 

"You are such a freaking BABY, KK." You shove him in John's general direction and tell him to go converse. You tap your foot impatiently until he gives you a glare and goes up to John muttering some "VERY" nice words under his breath. You see him attempt at a conversation and fail. Utterly. You facepalm with both your hands earning you a 2x combo. THIS. IS. STUPID. You can't wait until everyone gets down here. Speaking of which, here they come. 

First is Vriska Serket, an electric guitarist. You think that she's a bitch- but in a cool way. She's like that, and is a pretty hardcore rocker, and also a tiny bit flirty. Next is Terezi Pyrope, the oboist. She's pretty cool, even though she's blind. Her tongue makes up for her imbalance in senses. She loves plushies, especially scalemates, and also loves to roleplay with her good friend Nepeta Leijon. Speaking of which, there she is. Nepeta is..an interesting character. She's really friendly and easy to get along with. She's a steel drummer. She absolutely loves to roleplay and act like a cat. *cough catgirl cough* Heck, she's practically a cat herself. 

Here comes her almost boyfriend Equius Zahhak. He's crazy strong and accidentally breaks things really easily because he's just THAT strong. He sweats a lot too. He could probably fill like a million buckets and yet never run out of sweat. He's so strong that almost his whole body is broken. Just look at the guy. His teeth are broken, his horns are broken, and his shades are broken. Anyway, he's a tubist. What a weird word. Tubist. 

"Is that even legit?" you think to yourself. "No matter, it's legit in MY book." 

He needed an instrument that was strong like him and not as easily broken. Emphasis on the word "as". Let's see, there are 6 of you here, including yourself. The other six should be arriving soon. Hopefully. And hopefully Gamzee will be in his right mind which equals to being stoned. NEVER sober. Sober is BAD. You shudder to think of the last time he became sober. 

Anyway, there's Aradia Megido. Also known as your girlfriend. Your heart beats a little faster and she flashes a smile your way but doesn't approach you. You could go on all day about how great and pretty and blah blah blah she is, but that's a little too much right now. She's a harpist and it suits her so well. She's so graceful...Your mind wanders and you don't notice Feferi coming up behind you. Well, here she is. Feferi Peixes, one of your really close friends and a flutist. Like Aradia, her instrument suits her because it's all high-pitched and bubbly and happy like her. She loves to dress in really colorful colors and her tiara is part of every outfit. She's a legit princess. 

Oh no. It's Eridan. Eridan Ampora. The troll who makes moves on every guy and gal anywhere, practically HANDING himself out like a bad business card. Nice comparison there, Sollux. You congratulate yourself by giving a mental high five. He's not exactly your friend, but he's actually okay to be around. He's just a little...misunderstood. He used to go out with Feferi, being a prince himself, but they've broken up and became "just friends". 

Apparently being "just friends" is not enough or unsatisfying, because he's trying to make moves on her. AGAIN. You wonder when this guy is actually going to get a real girlfriend. You hope it's soon. There are three more trolls to yet arrive. No wait, two. Kanaya Maryam strolls in with a classy sort of air about her. She's a cellist and an aspiring fashion designer. She's got mad skills at designing clothes and the like. She's also the troll version of a vampire, called a "rainbow drinker". Unlike some vampires in the human world, she doesn't sparkle, she GLOWS. Glows like a freaking light bulb. Good thing she can control her..um..shiny-ness, let's put it that way. Everything about her is classy; her hair, her clothes, her horns, the way she talks, the way she walks, and even the way she applies her lipstick. As you complete that last phrase, there she goes and applies a fresh coat of her signature green lipstick.

Suddenly you hear a screech resounding through all the hallways on the floor above. You cringe and so does everybody else. All of you look up and as you do so, you hear a honk and a shrill scream. Ohhhh no. Not now, not now, not now, whyyyyy. It's going to make John run out as soon as he sees those two. Well, one. Only one because there is a single troll who never fails to creep out the new kids, ever. The honking and screaming becomes closer and louder as the last two trolls make their entrance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the best chapter I have written so far, if I do say so myself~
> 
> Karkat: Pfft, you're getting too far ahead of yourself..
> 
> A0H: HMPH! I'm trying to raise my self-confidence in writing a fanfic, but NOOOO you just have to shoot me down like that! *pushes Karkat away* Anyway, who are these two new trolls? Will John actually leave? Find out by reading the next chapters ;D
> 
> Reviews please? ;u; It will help my writing and maybe give me some new ideas~~ :D


	5. uHHH,,,Honk :O)

Everything seems to be in slow-mo as Gamzee and Tavros come rolling in. Literally. Karkat looks at them with his mouth open in a very unattractive way. They screech to a halt in the middle of the room and leave tire marks on the floor that trail all the way from Gog knows where to where they are now. Everyone is frozen, at the moment, as they just stare at the duo. Well, not everyone, because Terezi is blind. You are pretty sure she can smell what's happening, though. Oh yes. Gamzee and Tavros? Let's start the ball rolling again by introductions. Gamzee Makara, the trumpeter and the school clown. He IS a clown, to be exact, always carrying a horn or one of his sopor pies. He's a hardcore juggalo. It's like his profession and main reason for his whole life. His whole being. He can be pretty creepy, just look at that face. You're pretty sure he scarred everybody permanently when he completely flipped out until KK shooshed and papped him. So, the lesson here is to never let Gamzee become sober again. Ever. You blame the sopor pie and his endless supply of Faygo, even though that's not technically true. Or IS it? Now for Tavros. Tavros Nitram, he's such a sweet kid. Always trying to help everybody, even with his disability. His disability is- wait, you'll mention it at the end to tie into the scene that just happened a few moments ago. He plays the French horn, and like some other trolls you know, it fits him so well. The sweet, mellow notes that come out winds up and punches you in the feels so hard. He's even named the thing. You forgot what it was, though. You make a mental note to ask him later. He and Vriska had a thing going on, but you're not sure if they're dating, had dated, or completely avoid each other at all costs. You don't really see why Vriska chose him, no offense, but Tavros speaks with a major stutter (not unlike your lisp) and seems way too bookish and quiet (more like too innocent and naive) for the likes of her.

Now to the scene at hand. You connect two and two together to make a guess that somehow Gamzee attacked poor, innocent Tavros while he was minding his own business to get a ride on his wheelchair. That's right. Tavros is a paraplegic, and if that word is too hard for you people, it basically means he lost the use of his legs. Hence the use of his wheelchair. Anyway, so Gamzee attacked Tavros, got a ride on his wheelchair while he was honking his horn and Tavros was screaming all the way down the stairs. DOWN. THE. STAIRS. Seriously, it's a miracle nobody got hurt or something going down about 50 or so stair steps. It's a spiral staircase too. By this time, you are 99.99999 percent sure John will start packing his bags in a few seconds, because stuff like this happens pretty much every day. You look over at him and try to gauge his reaction by the expression on his face. You can see it start to twitch a little and start crinkling up. Oh GOG. Is he going to CRY?! You open your mouth to start apologizing like there's no tomorrow but he completely floors you and everyone else in the room by laughing. Yes. By LAUGHING. Well, that escalates quickly and almost everyone is laughing, including you, except for KK. How can he NOT be tickled by that sweet, sweet sound coming out of John? You start to get some angry vibes from him that quickly turns to rage. Thar he blows! He starts yelling at everyone to shut up and you see John approach him to attempt to calm him down. Bad move there, John. He turns to John and starts screaming at him, saying that he ruined everything, that everyone ruined everything, and that he himself ruined everything. He clenches his hands into fists and a tear starts making its way down his face. The room becomes completely silent as they watch- or in Terezi's case, smell-that single tear come down and drop on the floor, leaving a small red spot. He bows his head to hide his face and runs out, leaving a room full of 11 confused trolls and one sad human.

It's time for a character switch. Might as well go to Karkat. Karkat? Where are you? *camera moves in different directions to find KK in a shadowed corner. He's currently tightly curled up in a ball sobbing his heart out. "Karkat..? Do you think that you can-?" He flips you off without looking up. Way to make the narrator mad, Karkles. Fine. It won't be you. Time to use that random character selector again. And it chooses...Sollux? I'm sure that he's tired of explaining everything. Try again. It chooses unspecified character #1. Unspecified character number one's name is Dave. Dave Strider. The ultimate cool kid of all cool kids, he keeps all his emotions hidden behind a pair of righteous cool shades. He's the go-to guy for all things cool and for his irony. His specialties are rapping, DJing, and anything that involves turntables, records, irony, and all-around coolness. He drops those ill beats like a hailstorm and he's not stopping for anyone. Once you've boarded the cool train, there's no way out and no stopping either. So, to conclude, you are now Dave Strider. At the moment, you are currently pestering Rose Lalonde, one of your close friends and your genetic sister. Your fingers pause for a second on the keyboard as you register the information that she gave you. 

"There's a new student here", she says. A new kid? You can't remember the last time a new kid came, so this is pretty shocking for you. You finally tap back a reply, asking if it was another troll kid. She says no, it's a human kid. Now, that's interesting. You wonder if it's a boy or girl. Time to find out. You ask a few more questions, like asking where the kid was and how she found out. She takes some time to answer, but she finally does, "First question answer, Music Room, second question answer, Kanaya." 

"Kanaya Maryam, the troll girl?" you type, surprised. 

"Yes. She's a really good friend. I like her."

You have no answer but grab your rocket skateboard and head out the door, while stuffing your key lanyard into your pants pocket. You would take the elevator or something, but taking your rocket skateboard was faster and of course, cooler, and you wanted to impress the new kid with how cool and awesome you were. You maneuver your way around the winding staircase and burst in through the doors into the Music Room. 

"Welp", you think to yourself, "It's a dude." It's not that you were disappointed or anything, you should be celebrating right now because you aren't the only guy anymore in your group of...friends. He looks to be a nice person; at least, you hope and think so. He's currently talking to some troll with a Gemini sign on his shirt. What was his name again? Something with an "S". You'll ask later. You dismount from your skateboard and come up behind the kid and say, "'Sup." He turns around with a surprised expression and waves. You wait awkwardly, but make it look cool, until he finishes his conversation with..Sollux. Yes, that's his name. He turns back around to you and says with a smile, "My name's John. John Egbert." 

"Wait," you say, shocked, "THE John Egbert?" "THE PRODIGY?!" He gives you a somewhat confused look as to why you were freaking out but sticks out his hand and you pull him into a bro hug kind of embrace. 

"My name's Dave Strider." Okay, so maybe that wasn't the coolest thing you ever said, but since John was being so polite, you couldn't really help it.

You suddenly grab hold of his hand and pull him onto your skateboard. Before he could say goodbye to anyone, you jump onto the skateboard and you both rocket out of the room. 

"Where are we going?", he screams, because you were going at such a high speed and the wind was whipping at both of your clothes. 

"What?" you yell. 

"Where are we going?" he repeats. 

"WHAT?" you say again. 

This goes on for a few minutes until you suddenly stop in mid-air just to hear what he was saying. He stumbles forward, and he would've fallen off if you didn't grab onto the back of his shirt with your lightning fast reflexes. 

"What..did..you..say..?", your voice a little hoarse from yelling. 

"I said...Where are we going?" He answers back.

"Oh. I knew that." You rub the back of your head, mussing your hair up. "Where ARE we going?" "I forgot." 

John gives you a look of disbelief. "Why don't you take me on a tour around the academy then, so if you remember, we can go back to where we were supposed to go?"

"GENIUS.", you answer. "Alright", you say, as you fire up the rocket boosters on your skateboard, "Let's do this." 

You prepare to take off when John suddenly yells, "WAITTT!" "Don't go so fast this time. I think I'm gonna hurl." You sigh in exasperation but agree to go slower. You decide to make a rap while you're going around the school to make the tour a little, well, cooler. You drop those righteous raps and you can see John start to revel in your coolness. After you're done, he claps and proclaims that you are a genius. You give a small smile and thumbs up, which he returns. You nearly avoid crashing into a door and totaling your skateboard, because you were definitely not paying attention.

You pull out a bottle of apple juice from your pocket and start to open it when John suddenly shrieks. Startled, you drop that bottle of apple juice and watch forlornly as it plummets to the ground below. You pout with your lip sticking out like a little kid and say, "That was my favorite bottle of apple juice. It was a PRESENT." "WHY JOHN. WHY." You then proceed to break into tears. *record rips* CUT CUT CUT! Let's try this again. Alright, just kidding. Who do you think you are? Dave Strider does not do such things like that. Okay, fine. 

So, you drop your bottle of apple juice and angrily turn to John who gives you this oh-so-innocent look. You point your finger accusingly at him and ask why he said that. He gives you another innocent look and tells you it's because everyone knows that apple juice is actually piss. Wait, WHAT? HOLD THE MOTHERFUCKING PHONE. You flashback to all those moments you drank apple juice, starting ever since you were a kid. All those happy times, ruined in those few seconds by what John just said. You shudder to think about it. 

"No way, man. Apple juice is the bomb and it is not piss." 

He gives you a wry look that clearly said, "Keep thinking that to yourself, but one day it will come back and haunt you." Geez, this kid is weird. Right now, you don't give two shits about him being a world famous prodigy or otherwise. 

"So uh, John," you start. "Yeah?" he answers. "It's time for..." You pause dramatically. 

"For what?" he asks. You don't answer. "…Dave…?" 

You fire up those rocket boosters as you yell, "FOR A WILD RIDE!" You grin wickedly and your glasses gleam "so sugoi". You then proceed to rocket around the school with John screaming behind you. Sweet revenge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew. Longest chapter EVER. I hope you guys aren't bored by my fanfic ;u;
> 
> John, we love you, but apple juice is NOT piss. Really.
> 
> I really like the whole "rolling in" part. Because Tavros is in a wheelchair, geddit? Hahahahaha haha... No? ...I'll stop now.
> 
> Please review?
> 
> -A0H


	6. MusicAcademyStuck Intermission 1

You are John. You have been in your room for half of the day, trying to play this one piece that refuses to cooperate with you. You groan as you play the same note wrong for the umpteenth time and you wonder if you should just give up. As soon as this thought forms in your head, Karkat pops in your room and asks how the playing is going. You force a fake smile on your face and say that it's going so well, when it actually isn't. You do this because Karkat was the one who composed this piece specifically for you, since you guys were such "great" friends nowadays. What really happened was that he told you to meet him after you were done practicing the piano, and as you started to leave the room, he slapped a binder in your face and yelled at you. 

It went something like this, *smack* "HEY DUMBASS! YOU'RE GOING TO PLAY THIS FUCKING MUSIC BECAUSE I MADE IT FOR YOU! YOU UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT!" 

Yeah, something like that. All you really remember is that it involved him yelling at you for no apparent reason. You thought that you might as well play it, seeing as all the other pieces of music were pretty old and you memorized them all anyway. And so, the story went. Wait. What? That didn't make any sense. So, back to the scene at hand, Karkat gives you a smirk that clearly says that he doesn't believe a word that is coming out of your mouth but doesn't say anything. He tells you that you are going to play in front of all your friends, with all your friends in a few minutes.

As soon as those words come out, they just hang in the air and crash violently towards the floor as your world shatters around you. 

"B-b-b-b-but I CAN'T." You say.  
He raises his eyebrow and says, "Oh? Why?" He enquires a little too politely of why not. 

You mind struggles to combat this move and you yell out the first thing that comes to your mind. "BECAUSE I HAVE TO IRON MY CLOTHES." 

He gives you the poker face, not believing a single word of what you are saying. 

"IF I DON'T IRON MY CLOTHES, WE. ARE. ALL. GOING. TO DIE." He gives you a "WTF" look as you zoom out the door, only to crash into Dave. 

"DAVE!" You scream, "I'M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU!" 

He gives you a puzzled look and shrugs. 

"YOU HAVE GOT TO SAVE ME. NOW." 

He absconds and slams the door to his room. You start to panic a little bit. He was your only hope because he's supposedly your best friend, but now you are reconsidering that statement. No matter, you need to get away, fast. You hear Karkat coming out of your room into the hallway calling your name in an angry voice. You start sobbing as you run in random hallways, crashing into walls like an utter fool. Someone taps you on the shoulder and you start screaming. 

"NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE". You start to flail wildly and you somehow kick your apparent "attacker" in the head. In retaliation, they put you in a mild chokehold to calm you down. They proceed to dump you on the floor and sit on you. You smack the floor repeatedly to show that they should give you some mercy, and they eventually do. You cough and dust yourself off. You glare at the person- you mean, troll- and she shrugs her shoulders and sits down next to you.

You are Nepeta Leijon. Also known as John's attacker. You were walking down the hallway when you heard screaming that was approaching faster and louder. You sighed. Why couldn't there be any normalcy in this school? You prepared to do your job as the defender of peace. Just kidding. You pounced on John and sat on him before he had a chance to instinctively do anything and he completely flipped the fuck out. It was pretty amusing, actually. So, you waited until he calmed down before you spoke. Now, since he calmed down, you ask him why he was flipping out and he said that it was because he was scared. 

"Scared of what?" You ask. 

"Karkat", he answers. 

"Interesting", you purr, "It's not surprising since Karkitty has some issues. Anger issues, in fact." 

"Karkitty?" He asks, his eyes widening before his mouth twitches and breaks out in a huge smile. He then starts laughing his ass off while you smile a little. "Nepeta", he asks, "Can you help me with something?" 

"Sure", you say, "Why not." He then proceeds to drag you to the Music Room and shoves you in a seat before he takes a seat himself. 

"Okay", he says with all seriousness. "I need you to help me with this…"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A0H: Gee, Karkat, you are REALLY pushy, you know that?
> 
> Karkat: SHUT THE FUCK UP! WHO ASKED YOU?!
> 
> A0H: I asked MYSELF. SO THERE.
> 
> Karkat: JUST. GO.
> 
> A0H: PFFT. FINE.
> 
> Well folks, there's another intermission coming up really really soon... *hint hint* ;D
> 
> -A0H


	7. What?

Your revenge lasted for a grand total of one hour, thirty two minutes, and 5 seconds. It consisted of high speed rocketing, near death twists, spins, and turns, and one really sweet grind that would have made your brother proud. You bet that John would be so blown away by how cool this whole ride was. You look behind you to check behind you, and surprisingly, he was still there. Whenever you gave a ride to anyone like this, they would end up in weird places. You heard a rumor that one person fell into a toilet. You wondered how that could've happened, because you were nowhere near a toilet. Oh well, it was that kid's fault for not hanging on tight enough. Although John was still hanging on, he was gripping onto you a little too tightly and his face was set in an uncomfortable, pale expression. You stop your skateboard and he just falls off. You frown and look down at him just laying there on the grass. You kick him slightly with your foot and he makes no response. 

"John…?" You draw out his name and hush it to a whisper towards the end. You turn to go get someone for help when he attacks you from behind.

"GAHASHDJASHDKJASHDKJASHGDHAS HDGAJ!" You both collapse on the ground, who knew John was strong? He looks like he weighs like seventy pounds or something. You guess not. But really, he isn't all that heavy or strong looking. You easily throw him off you and laugh. 

"Nice try, John ", you say. He dusts himself off and shrugs. "So, how did you like my awesome tour of the school?" 

He gives you a "WTF" look and says, "It was a little too fast for me." 

"Well," you say, "Any questions?" 

"Yeah," he says, "only like, a BILLION."

You laugh and slap him on the back. He a lmost falls over but you catch him in time. 

"You ok, bro?" He nods a little, then smiles. "Alright," you say, "What's your biggest and first question?" 

He taps his chin and says, "What's the name of this school?" 

You blink and say, "Well, that would be the last thing I would ask but anyway, this school is called Naturae Cor dis Pulsatio, which means-." 

You are cut off from someone behind you. "..Which means nature's heartbeat, am I right...Dave Strider?" You shriek a little and whirl around and see none other than Rose Lalonde, also known as your sister. You recover your cool façade in a matter of s econds. 

"Rose," you say, "Meet the new kid, John Egbert." 

"Dave, I know who he is, remember?" 

"Oh yeah," you say, "I forgot." 

She sighs and turns to John, offering her hand out to shake. 

"Rose Lalonde ," she says. 

"John Egbert," he says, shaking her hand, taking this completely in stride. You sigh deeply, and shake your head at how damn polite your sister can be. 

"Rose," you smirk, "Shouldn't you go hang out with Kanaya?" 

"Why," she asks , oh-so-innocently. 

"Rose," you say in exasperation, "Kanaya clearly likes you as more than a friend." 

"Really," she says, stretching out the word really annoyingly. 

"Yes," you scream, "Of course, now go away so I can talk to John." You shove her towards the general direction of the academy while she shoots John a bemused look. She sashays off as you smirk at her retreating form. "Pfft. So, John, anything you would like to as-." You are abruptly cut off again as someone or something attacks you from behind, accompanied with a high pitched squeal.

Here she is, Jade Harley. Otherwise known as your ex-girlfriend. 

"Hey Dave! You sigh as prepare yourself to turn around. 

"How many times am I going to get interrupted until I get to speak to John?" You struggle a little to compose yourself, because this was starting to get on your nerves. Here we go. "Why hello Jade," you say, "Here to meet the new student?" 

"Yes!" She giggles, "Isn't he the prodigy? I'm so excited for him to attend this school!" 

"Are you here for his autograph or something?" You ask dryly. 

She perks up and says, "Of course! How did you know?" 

"Go figure..." You mutter under your breath. "Oh, just a lucky guess." While you were talking, she ran up to Joh n and shoved a piece of paper in his face. He smiles a little bit and politely asks for something to write with. Jade whips out a pencil from Gog- knows-where and pretty much shoves that in his face too. With a flourish, he writes his name and hands the paper and pencil back to J ade. She beams as you sigh in exasperation. "GOOD GOD JADE. MUST YOU DO THAT? You're going to embarrass John for life. SHEESH." She stares at you with a weird look on her face. 

"Dave? Can you please come talk to me for a second? In private? " Jade questions you and you start sweating a little because you can guess what's about to happen next. She's going to ask if you like- "Do you like John?" There it is. Just as you suspected. You couldn't answer that question, really! You weren't sure if you did, because you hide your emotions so much that you couldn't really feel them anymore. Luckily for Jade, and unluckily for you, your face told the whole story. You mean, what was visible of your face. You silently scream your thanks up to the sky that you have your ever-present "cool kid" shades on yo ur face. Because of those shades, your face was only halfway visible. Too bad they don't cover up your whole face, because your cheeks feel like they're burning up a little bit and...you probably look like an idiot right now.

Jade peers closely at your face and nods, confirming your emotions. You restrain the urge to kick yourself and possibly someone else. 

"I would like him too, Dave. He's pretty cute, you know." Your mouth opens a little bit in surprise, because you secretly think this too. 

"You're not mad? I mean, I'm sorry it didn't work out between us before and-" Jade cuts you off in mid-sentence. 

"Well, to be honest, I'm a little bit upset, but I understand!" She smiles and laughs a little, and then it hits you pretty hard. The " it" is the understanding, because now you fully realize why you liked Jade when you did. Other than her being a really great bass player, and really nice and pretty and etc. etc., she was kind, full of understanding, and pretty supportive. You step forward and give her a hug, which she returns. 

"Welp, I got to go take care of some business, so do what you want with John and all that stuff. See you around!" With that being said, she quickly disappears, leaving you in a state of confusion and amazement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that was very eventful...Will John ever find out Dave's feelings? Was Dave just kidding around with his emotions? Will people stop interrupting Dave..?
> 
> Reviews are love, remember that!  
> -A0H


	8. Motherfucking Miracles

"'I would like him too, Dave. He's pretty cute, you know.'" These words bounce around your head as you look up and stare at the sky for what seems to be an eternity. How had she known? Was she really that perceptive or were you just that bad at hiding crushes? You're pretty sure it's the first choice, because cool kids don't make those kinds of mistakes. While you're thinking about all this, John comes up and taps you on the shoulder, snapping you out of your reverie. 

"So, uh, I can tell you're not going to tell me what Jade was talking with you about." This obviously isn't a question, it's a statement. 

"Yeah. How about we go back to asking questions, like we were doing?" He nods and you relax a bit, but that moment is shattered when someone jumps down from a tree and lands right in front of you.

Startled, you back up and crash into John, causing him to fall over. He grabs onto the back of your shirt to try to pull himself up before he hits the ground, but he ends up making you both fall. In the "chaos", your glasses fell off your face and is now perched upon John's face. 

"Am I cool like you now, Dave?" He asks. You're speechless because for one, that question was so totally not related to what just happened and two, you catch yourself looking at his face for more than a few seconds. He looked way too cute with those on, but you couldn't let yourself slip up like that. 

"Nope," you retort, as you take them back, "Nobody can be as cool as me, except for-" You are cut off (AGAIN!) by your older brother, Dirk Strider. 

"-ME!" He yells, obviously proud of himself for ruining your moment. 

"Dirk, what ARE you doing here?" You shout, "And how long were you up in that tree?!" Your brother takes off his signature hat for a few seconds to scratch his head.

"Well, not that long, maybe two minutes?" 

"You don't go to this school!" 

"Yeah, I know, I know, but I do something ELSE at this school" He flaps his hand in your direction. "I only stayed up in that tree while I was going to 'cause I saw something interesting, if you know what I mean?" His pointy anime shades gleam out "SO SUGOI!", as countless fangirls swoon somewhere out there in the world.

"Yeah? What was so interesting that you would stop on your way to your job? And no, I DON'T know what you mean..." You smirk. 

"Well, lil' dude, I saw this kid down here," He says, pointing at John. 

"Yeah, so?" 

"He's a prodigy, Dave. A prodigy!" 

"And?" You deadpan. He shakes his head at you. 

"You should be more excited, Dave. Come on. You should also totally give him a smuppet. Bitches love smuppets-" 

"Ah, nah, I think he's had enough excitement for one day, right, John?" 

"What? Oh, yeah, sure." You take him by the shoulder and start to lead him inside the school. 

"I think it's time for dinner, so, let's go. Okay?" 

"Okay..." He gives you and your brother a confused look as you quickly steer him inside the school building to avoid further incidents. 

"Shit, shit, shit!" You think as you do so. "This is going downhill really fast... Everything was great until THAT happened." You sigh as doors slam shut behind you two. The sigh turns to a gasp as you and John are bombarded with food from all your friends. Not one for missing a chance of a food fight, you quickly retaliate and join in. Pretty soon, everyone's laughing and having a good time, until Gamzee pulls out his sopor slime pies. 

"OH FUCK NO!" Everyone screams. 

"Miracles. Motherfucking miracles," He says. There's a silence, and then more food flies in every direction at him for Round Two.

Outside, your brother laughs quietly to himself as he watches the scene happening outside from a window. 

You are now Dirk Strider. You are the older brother of Dave, a beatboxer, an engineer, sword fighter, and teacher. Oh yes, you're also a graduate of this school. You graduated years back with your friends, and before that, the four of you- Jake, Jane, Roxy, and yourself- made a promise to come back to teach the younger generations. True to the promise, all of you came back. You're older than what you'd like to admit, as you sigh ruefully. It seemed just like yesterday when you and your friends were outside, having the time of your lives. The years passed by too quickly, in your opinion, but here you were. Again. Looking at the rapidly escalating food fight, you think whether you should go inside and stop it. You dismiss the thought quickly, deciding to let it go on. You could tell this was going to be one heck of a school year...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue: Just kidding. It's not done yet. The story, I mean. There's a lot more things that are going to happen. Okay, I'll stop now.  
> After the conclusion of the food fight about an hour later, everyone gets ready for a new day of school. What they don't know is that there are going to be a challenge presented to them in the form of a rival school. What is this rival school? When are Dirk's friends going to be introduced? When will the author actually set things in motion for real? When will the story actually get good? For goodness sakes, when will EVERYTHING make sense?!
> 
> Stay tuned and all that stuff..
> 
> -A0H

**Author's Note:**

> Well, well, well, welcome to the grand *not* adventure of my first ever fanfic! It would be nice if you (the readers) would write a helpful review or just drop a message while you're at it! *desperate hoping* Hope you guys like this... as the plot ever develops...
> 
> -A0H


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